


This is Home

by sodaguzzler



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15x20, 15x20 Carry On, Cas is Gay, Castiel Winchester - Freeform, Dean - Freeform, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Dean Winchester is a bisexual mess, Dean/Therapy - Freeform, I did not get emotionally attached to Dean Winchester only for him to die because of a fucking nail, I miss Dean Winchester, Jack - Freeform, Jack Kline uses They/Them pronouns deal with it, Jack kline - Freeform, M/M, Okay Eric you got us wheres the real Supernatural ending?, SPN - Freeform, Sam - Freeform, Sam Winchester - Freeform, Sam and Dean finally go to the beach, Sam and Dean never actually made it to the beach smh, Supernatural - Freeform, Supernatural Finale Fix-It, The Supernatural fandom is not okay, castiel - Freeform, dont worry guys ill fix it for you, i hate the supernatural finale ending, the way i hate the supernatural finale should be a crime
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:42:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27666277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sodaguzzler/pseuds/sodaguzzler
Summary: This book is basically a continuation/alternate ending to the Supernatural series finale (since neither Cas or Jack were in it)Thank you Supernatural, you have shaped not only my life, but the lives of many.Carry on Spn fandom<3
Relationships: Cas/Dean - Relationship, Castiel/Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester/Castiel, Dean/Castiel, Dean/Therapy
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	This is Home

Heaven 

Dean never thought he would make it. 

He silently thanked Jack every day for them and their new-found godly powers, and he thanked them for fixing Heaven, and thanked them for everything else in between. However, something still stirred in the back of his mind. Something that had been sitting there for what seemed like forever, something he didn't like to think about. 

Cas. 

Bobby mentioned that Cas helped fix up Heaven with Jack, so does that mean he's okay? And if he was okay why didn't he come to see Dean and confront him, be happy with him and Sam in their own personal heaven? Dean didn't like to think about it, he didn't like the thought of Castiel leaving him, he didn't like the thought of Cas being there and not saying anything, staying quiet and in the background. No, he didn't like it at all. 

"Somethings wrong."

Sam's voice broke through Deans absurd thoughts, the purr of Baby's engine reminding him of where he was. In the car, driving at full speed with his little brother in the passenger seat. 

"No...No I'm fine." 

Sam let out a small laugh, sticking his arm out through he rolled down window and glancing over at Dean. 

"You're not fine, I know that face-" 

An eyeroll was Deans only reply as Sam went on with his tangent on how he could read Dean like an open book. Dean didn't mind though, he knew Sam would continue to pester him until he told him what was up. 

"I'm just thinking about what Bobby said, when I first got to Heaven when I died." 

"What did he say?" 

Dean swallowed, trying to get out the words, trying to say his name without thinking back to the day Cas got taken. Sam pulled his arm back inside of the car and rolled up the window, a puzzled look painted on his face. 

"He said- he said that Heaven was fixed and all that...that Jack did it-"

"And?"

The engine roared as Dean sped down the open road, pushing his foot down harder on the gas pedal. 

"And he said that Cas helped." 

Sams puzzled face was now screwed with confusion. 

"Cas? Isn't he-" 

"In the empty? Yeah, I thought so too...but now I'm not so sure...how could he help restore Heaven if he was dead?"

Dean pulled over on the side of the road, the smell of pine and wood hit him like a bus. Sam opened the passenger door, the loud squeak of the doors echoing throughout the damp and humid forest that surrounded them. Dean hopped out of his seat and slammed the door while shoving his hands into his leather jacket pockets, the leather jacket he hadn't worn in years. 

"Maybe he isn't dead." 

Sam sighed, leaning against Baby with his arms crossed. He had said it like it was no big deal. Like it was just any other statement or phrase. But it meant something, it meant that Dean still had a chance with Cas. It meant that they could- 

No. 

Dean couldn't get his hopes up, he couldn't think that way. Even if Cas was alive there was no way he would be here. The angel would never come back to the place where some of his biggest mistakes were made. 

"Maybe." 

Deans reply was soft and quiet, he could feel Sam's gaze burning into his back but he didn't say anything. He knew that if he told his brother how he really felt about the seraph that he wouldn't believe him. 

"Anything else on your mind, Dean?" 

"No." 

The lie slipped so easily off of Deans tongue. Of course he had something on his mind, he always had something on his mind. Even if he was at peace and living in his own personal heaven with his brother. Dean sighed heavily and began making his way into the forest, Sam following close behind.  
They walked for awhile, not saying a word and just looking. Looking at the gorgeous trees that grew up to as far as the eye could see. Looking at the fallen green and yellow and orange leaves that blanketed the springy forest floors. 

"Who would've thought we'd end up here? Heaven." 

"Hmm?"

He hummed a reply, hardly paying attention to what Sam was saying at all. 

"After everything we've been through...after all the hurtles we've jumped...We're finally happy."

Dean paused, stopping in his tracks and inhaling deeply through his nose, it smelt like fresh rain on pavement and early, dewy Saturday mornings. 

"A very smart guy once told me, that good things do happen." 

Silence. 

"I know you think about him too, Dean. It's obvious you do...you know, your pupils used to dilate when you talked about him-"

Dean could hear the stupid smile in Sam's face as embarrassment washed over him. 

"Shut up." 

And that was that. They drove for as long as they saw fit and went back to the place they called home. Of course, it was the bunker. The only home they both have ever had in a long time, Miracle greeting them at the door. He died and went to their personal Heaven long before Sam did of course, apparently Jack made it to where animals went to heaven with you as soon as it was their time. Dean threw his keys down onto the map table, a heavy sigh following shortly after. Sam returned from the kitchen with two beers in hand, tossing one to Dean, who caught it and opened it with his hand as if it were nothing.  
For a long while they sat there, just the two of them. Drinking alcohol and reminiscing on the days where they were worried over a demon possession on a plane, or a poltergeist in an old rickety house, or any other small hunt they went on when they were still alive and in their twenties. They talked about family, who were either dead, or close to it at least. About Mary and Jody and the girls, Kaia and Claire and Alex and Patience. The talked about everyone they'd saved along the way. Talked about everyone they'd lost. 

And they talked about Cas. 

Thats when Dean left. 

He hated talking about Cas, which is why when Sam began talking about his death way back when, before Dean died at the hands of a nail in his back, he shut him down. Telling him that he had to let go, but in reality, Dean was still holding on. He was still thinking about the angel with a crack in his chassis every single day of his afterlife, he was still thinking about him when he saw the sky and the lakes and rivers. He thought about Castiel all the time but was too afraid of facing the fact that he didn't get a chance to tell the seraph how he really felt about him. Too afraid of facing the fact that Cas died thinking that no one loved him, and that he was the Winchesters bulldog on a leash. Too afraid to face the fact that he had to live with the "I love you" ringing in his head and the look on his face has Cas was swallowed whole by that cosmic being. 

Dean saw Cas in everything he looked at. And it was killing him from the inside out. 

The now deceased hunter walked throughout the halls aimlessly, the same halls he and his angel desperately ran through to escape death when he was alive. He stopped when he saw the door to the dungeon, the room where it happened. The room he had never walked into since Cas got taken, even when he was dead he never dared to reopen that infected wound. Dean felt a sob rising up into his throat, so he quickly made his way past it, not wanting to ever think about that room or the pain that festered in it again. But, Dean knew he would have to at some point. Knowing that it would continue to drag him further down into a sea of pain and torment. 

Dean cleared his throat, looking down beside him when he felt Miracle lick at his hand a few times. 

"Good boy." 

He whispered, placing his hand on the side of the dogs face and lightly scratched behind his ear with a small smile. Dean continued to walk slowly to his room, even though they were in heaven and didn't need sleep, he tried to make it a part of his every day routine. It was something Cas would have wanted him to do. He looked down at Miracle one more time before gripping the doorknob and opening his door quietly, flopping down onto his bed stomach first with a heavy sigh, knowing that things wouldn't change. Cas would still relive his greatest regrets for eternity and there was nothing he could do to help him. 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"We should go to the beach." 

Dean announced one morning out of the blue, spreading the butter on his perfectly cooked toast. 

"The beach? Why?"

Sam set his plate down on the table quickly and threw some of the dirty dishes into the sink before sitting down. Dean took the spot in front of him and shrugged, lazily scooping a forkful of scrambled eggs into his mouth, only speaking when he finished chewing and swallowing, God knows how much it pissed Sam off when he talked with his mouth full. 

"I dunno..I used to talk about it all the time, once we got our happy ending we would go to the beach-" 

"Hula shirts and our toes in the sand?" 

"Exactly! And since we're at eternal rest we can go whenever we want." 

Sam laughed to himself, and shook his head, as if he found Deans suggestion amusing. 

"What's so funny?" 

He asked his brother, finishing his food and setting his plate down on the floor for Miracle to lick up the scraps just like he used to do when they were alive. 

"I didn't think you remembered, it was a long time ago." 

"For you maybe." 

Dean took his plate off the floor, now licked clean, and set it in the sink. He leaned against the counter with his arms crossed against his chest. They were  
both quiet for a few minutes, the only sounds in the room were Miracles painting and the water from the running faucet.

"So? What do you say? You and me on the road again?"

Sam nodded, letting out an approving sigh.

"On the road again."

He replied with a smile before walking out of the kitchen and clapping Deans shoulder once. 

"On the road again!" 

It felt like they were alive, like they were still on Earth and still living their happily ever after. Except here, it was happily ever after forever, with nothing to worry about and with nothing standing in the way of their happiness. All the loose end were tied and there was no price to be paid.

Everything was as it should be. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"California? Ooh! How about Florida!?" 

"Florida? But it's so...humid-"

Dean saw Sam scrunch up his nose just thinking about the sticky weather down in Florida, he snickered to himself and sighed, leaning back and feeling the leather seat of the Impala on his back through the light weight tee he was wearing. 

"What? you afraid your sacred locks won't be able to handle it?" 

Sam turned his head, giving Dean his iconic bitch face, Dean only smiled, knowing the small stuff that pushed Sam's buttons just enough to where he could get away with them, and not have shit escalate. 

"Cali it is then...Hey, maybe we'll have a private beach!" 

"Dean- this is Heaven, the rest of our afterlife is basically a private beach." 

Dean suddenly felt stupid, another wave of embarrassment rolled onto him. He laughed it off, insisting that he quote "knew that already" and was "just kidding around" or some other excuse to not make it seem like he had made a fool of himself yet again. Dean always knew Sam was the smart one, ever since he talked about running away to college to the day Dean broke into his apartment to take him on some twisted journey that would eventually last 15 long years. He always knew Sam was the smart one that would out live him. And he was right. 

It was a drive that took only an hour or two, considering how different time was in Heaven. And the beach was quiet, only the sound of waves and seagulls filled the empty silence. 

And then they drank. They drank and laughed and talked for what seemed like forever. If Dean was being honest, everything he did seemed like it lasted forever, and it probably did. 

The sun began to set and Sam had already clocked in for the night, sleeping in the back of the car like old times, it felt nostalgic almost, like they were young again, working any other job and hustling for cash, sleeping in the car like a couple of bums. But they had each other, so it didn't matter. Dean couldn't sleep that night, so he got out of the car as quiet as possible as to not wake his brother. 

It was quiet, and it was beautiful. Dean had never been to the beach when he was alive, but this was almost just as good. 

Almost. 

He walked along the shoreline by himself for a while, taking in the smell of the ocean and the sharp, cool air. Dean closed his eyes and tipped his head back, breathing deeply and fully, feeling tears run down his face for no particular reason. Not knowing if it was the joy or sorrow that was causing them. If it was the pain of losing Cas that was building up in him since that day he was taken from him, or if it was the bliss he felt now that he was free. Either way, Dean let the tears fall onto the sand and into the sea, pushing and pulling back over and over again in a slow and steady rhythm. It was peaceful almost. He opened his eyes and could feel the weight of the world finally fall off of his shoulders, the sense of duty, the feeling of not wanting to let go because of what he might leave behind, it was all gone. Dean looked down at the ground, watching as the water pooled around his boots ever so slightly every time the tide rushed in before being pulled back again. He lifted his head and only walked few more steps forward until seeing a figure standing in the distance. 

It was strange, it felt so familiar, the feeling was so familiar. As if he had seen this person so many times before. As Dean drew closer to the strange and mysterious silhouette, his heart dropped. Or did it just begin to beat faster? Or stop all together? 

A few more steps forward, the dark hair and relaxed posture were so familiar. 

Two more steps, the eyes with the whole universe summed up into one gorgeous shade of cyan and brilliant royal blue were so familiar. 

One more step. The angels hands that were set in the pockets of the tan trench coat so delicately, the way his lips were parted ever so slightly, the way his chin was tilted upward, as if he was hopeful for the future for the first time in a long time felt so, so familiar. The fallen seraph turned his head, looking at Dean as if he had known him since the beginning of time, looking at Dean as if he were the whole world. 

"Hello, Dean."

**Author's Note:**

> SHOULD I WRITE ANOTHER CHAPTER JSGRFJSHGFJSAHFJHRFJ  
> IDK I REALLY LIKED WRITING THIS ONE SO LEAVE A COMMENT?? MAYBE??


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